Can I?
by UntamedKittten
Summary: Edward's body slowly crouched, like he was ready to spring. "Mate," he hissed out. I did what seems to becoming a habit around him, I turned around and ran. B/E
1. Chapter 1

**Summery:** Bella's mother and step-father are killed. She is turned into the very thing that killed them. Weeks of torture, Bella escapes and runs to her fathers. Teaming up with wolves to kill all vampire that cross their land, only to find out that she is the mate of a certain bronzen haired vampire. Can Bella learn to love something she hates the most? Can she learn to love herself?

**Pairing: **Bella/Edward

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Twilight or any of the characters. All belongs to Stephenie Meyers.

...

**Chapter One - Dinner and Death?**

**BPOV**

"Hurry up sweetheart or we're going to be late" I heard my mother shout out to me from downstairs.

It's my sixteenth birthday today. I hate celebriting my birthday. I hate it when people spend money on me. I keep telling Renee - my mother - that I don't want anything or do anything but asual she doesn't listen. So here I am getting ready to go out for dinner with her and my step-father Phil. As Renee says "Bella you're only sixteen once and we're celebrting it. Now go up thoses strairs and get ready for dinner. End of discussion". So here I am up in my room getting ready.

Why can they just give me a card like my dad does?

Thinking of my dad, I looked next to me at the card he had sent me, sitting on my desk. He even sent a little note.

_Dearest Bella,_

_I hope that you have a wonderful day. Even though you'll want to treated it like any other day._

_Miss you lots. _

_Love Dad x_

Like I said a little note. I felt a little guitly when I read the part '_miss you lots'_. I haven't spent alot of time with my dad. My parent's got married right after high school and then had me. When I was only a few months old, Renee didn't want to stay in Forks for the rest of her life, so she deceided that it was time to leave and take me with her. I spent every summer with my father after that but stop going the pass three years. Forks isn't that best place to spend the Summer. It's gloomy, near-constant cover of clouds and rains more so than not.

But that guilty feeling will go away soon. As I plan on sending myself to my own personal hell to finish high school. You see, my mother has just got remarried. I want, no need to give her space and privacy with Phil. This was one discussion that I wasn't looking forward too. But I have thought long and hard about this. They didn't even go on a honeymoon.

"BELLA! COME ON!" my mother yells again shaking me out of my thought. I looked once more in the mirror in front of me. I was wearing a blue knee-length dress - my mother got me for tonight to wear - with leggings and blue plumps. We live in Pheonix, the nights are warm here, so I wasn't worried about getting cold. I grabbed my light black jacket and made my way carefully downstairs, holding onto the railing.

Every since I could remember I have always been clumsy. I really didn't want to visit the hosptial. When I got to the last step, a bright light flashed in my eyes, I nearly went fell flat on my face. Luckly Phil was there to catch me this time.

"Oh Bella. You look beauitful. Doesn't she look beauitful Phil?" my mother cooed, taking more picture with her camera. I, of course blushed and mumbled 'Thank you', embarassed by her comment. There was nothing beauitful about me, just plain Bella Swan here, dark brown hair, with dark brown eyes and pale skin.

My mother and I look alike, but her hair it shorter and she has laugh lines. We are very different to each other. She's more of a happy outgoing person. Always moving on to different things. Were as I like to stay home and read. She's always so happy and cheery. Always trying to get me to join in. Just last week, she tried to get me to do a salsa class with her, but I said no straight away. Remebering when I was a kid and she put me in a ballet class, lets just say I didn't do well.

"Are we ready to leave?" I asked. We made are way to the car and we were off the resturant. We already had a reservation here so we were guided to our table right away. It was really packed, which I was happy about because I trip over my feet and landed heavyly on my seat, making it screech on the floor. I blushed when I heard Renee and Phil chuckle.

Renee and Phil started to talk about Phil job. Phil is a minor leage baseball player. Having no interest in it, I looked around. It was a nice little resturant.

The waiter came a took our order. I had mushroom ravioli, while Renee and Phil had food was delious. We all had choclate cake for desert.

After desert Renee placed a small box in front of me.

"Mom you did'nt ha-" I started to say. But was cut off.

"Yes I did. It's your sixteen birthday. I don't want to hear you say anymore about it. Get it?" she said.

"Got it" I replied.

"Good. Now open". I bit my lip as I opened it. I was shocked. It was a lovely gold heart neckless that said speical daughter on it. My eyes started to water.

"Mom its beauitful" I croacked out. I stood up and gave her and Phil a hug. I'm not the one to give hugs, so Renee holded me a little longer.

As we sat back down I took a deep breath. I wish there was an easier way to tell Renee that I was going to stay with Charlie. I know she's going to think that she's done something wrong or am choosing Charlie over her. I crosssed my fingers and hope she's doesn't. Things just never go my way.

"Um, Mom...I've decided...um that I want to...um finish high school in...um Fork" I stuttered out.

She was very quiet and didn't say anything for awhile. But I knew it wasn't for long. Right on cue, she started. "Bella, honey. Are you serious? No, you can't be serious. You hate Forks. Whenever your father want you to visit you say no, and get him to come here. Why on earth do you want to go there? Why do you want to leave me? Have I done something?".

"No Mom, you haven't done anything. You're right I don't like Forks but you and Phil just got married. You need to have time together and with me here, you can't do that. So am going to Forks", I said quickly. Renee looked red face by the time I had finished.

"Bella, sweetheart. You don't have to go to Fork just because of us." Phil said softly. He wrap an arm around my mother and patted her back, trying to calm her down.

"It's not just that. Charlie's there. He's always wanting me to stay or visit more. So I think now is the best time to do that." I replied back.

"No, you're not going Bella. Phil and I have been married for a month and we've been fine so far. I don't understand. Some else has to have you thinking this way." my mother sounded like she was about to cry.

I looked into her childlike eyes, and notice that she was trying her best not to cry. I hated make her feel like this. Like it was her fault. Because it's not. I just want to give her time with her new husband.

"Mom, you haven't even been on a honeymoon yet." I tried to tell her, that am just in the way.

"There's plenty of tim-" Renee started, but I cut her off. "No Mom. You're surposed to go right after your wedding. But you didn't. You stayed here because of me. Because you didn't want to leave me alone. You have to let me do this".

Before she could reply, the waiter came over with the check.

After paying the bill, Phil, stood and looked at us "Shall we?"

Renee got up and turn to me "We'll discuss this more tommorrow. No more talk of it tonight. This is your birthday and we will not get into it".

I nodded my head in return and got up to follow her and Phil to get our coats. I put the neckless my mother bought me in my coat pocket. As I was more than liking to lose it. I have no idea where I put the box it came with.

I sighed when I looked at my mother. I knew this was going to take awhile for her to let me go. I just hope it doesn't take too long. I didn't want her to wollow, thinking that she has done something wrong.

As we were walking to the car, I had weird feeling. The feeling like you're being watched. I looked around to see if anyone was there, but couldn't see anyone. My heart still pounding in my chest, as I tried to shake the feeling away. As we neared the car I fell backwards on my butt as I didn't notice my mother had stop walking and slammed into her back. I picked myself up and was about to say sorry and ask what was wrong when I hear a stranger talk.

"Mmm, what do we have here?" A voice sounded in front of us. I looked around my mother and there stood the most handsome man I had ever seem. He was tall and lean. He was wearing torn blue jeans and only a black leather jacket, that showed his perfectly sculpted chest. He also had no shoes on. He had blonde hair that was tied loose around his neck. He was pale, more paler than I was. As I looked at his eyes closely, his eyes caught my attention. They were red. Everything inside told me to run, to get a far away from this man a possible.

Phil step in front of my mother "Who are you?". Fear was evident in his voice.

"It's always the same humanan questions. 'Who are you?'. 'What do you want?' " the man said smirking.

"Why are you doing this?" a female voice said behind us. I turned around I saw a woman. She was wearing black torn jeans, black top and white fluffy coat. She also had no shoes on. Her hair was orange and wild looking, blowing in the wind like flames of a fire. She also had pale skin and red eyes like the man had, but her eyes were more darker than his. She walk towards us like a feline.

"James, let's not play with our food" another voice said, with a slight hint of french. This time the voice came from the side of us. I turned around and saw another man. He was wearing black jeans, t-shirt and a brown coat. Also no shoes. He had black hair which was in deadlocks. He had olive-toned skin and red eyes.

Food? What the hell does he mean by food?

"Fine" James, the man I now knew the name to replied. The man with the dreadlocks grabbed Renee, while the woman grabbed Phil.

"Let them go" I yelled as I tried to get to my mom. James - the first man I saw- grabbed me from behind, wrapping his arm around my waist and placing his cold hand over my mouth. I tried my head so I could scream for help he had a hold of me which was very strong. I started kicking my legs back to hit him. I felt like kicking a wall.

"Someone fiesty, I liked to keep you around", James whispered in my ear. I shivered, very afraid of who or what these people were and why HE wanted to keep me.

"Let's go somewhere less out in the open", the woman said.

The next thing I knew I felt like I was flying. Everything was blurred as it passed me and made me feel nauseous, I closed my eyes hoping it would stop soon. Finally we had stop. James dropped me for his shoulder and turned me to face an old abdonded builden. I thought I was going to be sick as he walked us through the building. What looked like blood was splattered around the room; on the walls and floors. Three or four body lay in the corner, it was hard to tell as the lay across one another. Oh God! Who are these people.

Renee and Phil being tied and gagged to the chairs. I was then tied up. But didn't have a gag placed on me. I relised that they wanted to talk to me or make me scream.

"Before we begin having some fun lets first introduce everyone. My name is James. This," - he pointed to the man with the dreadlocks - " is Laurent and this," - grabbing the woman around the waist, careassing her face - "wonderful creature is Victoria". She made a noise that sounded like a cat purring and kissed him. What the hell are these people?

"What's your name?" he asked me. I turned my head away from him, not answering. He stepped in front of me and grabbed my chin roughly towards him. I kept my eyes down, not wanting him to see the fear in my eyes.

"Look at me." he said. My eyes shot up to his I heard the anger in his voice. "Never look away from me when am talking. Now I asked you a question, now answer."

He tighten his hold on my face. I refused to speak to this monster.

"Mmm, someone's stubborn." he said letting go of face. He walked behind me and grabbed my hair. "Victoria." he called out.

I watched as Victoria walked towards Phil. She grabs his head, bending her face to his neck and bit him. I heard my mom screaming something through her gag.

"Stop it. Stop it." I screamed.

"Tell me your name and I'll tell her to stop." James whispered, his cold breath blow across my ear, making me shiver.

"Isabella Swan. Bella." I croaked out.

"Victoria enough." James commanded.

Victoria stop drinking from Phil and looked up at me. Her lips, chin and neck were covered in Phil's blood. I started getting dizzy, just by the sight. I've never been good with blood. She smiled evily at me. Phil started to shake violently, like he was in pain. What on earth has she done to him? God please let him be ok.

"Now look what you did. If you just told me your name to begin with, your father would have survived longer" James said to me.

"Mmm, he's yummy." Victoria cooed, stroking Phil's face.

"Leave him alone." I said to her.

"Why would I want to listen to a weak human like you?" she sneered at me.

Human? Why did she make it seem like she wasn't?

Everything came to me at once. The speed. The Strenght. The coldness. The red eyes. Drinking blood.

I've read enough un my life to understand these?

My eyes widened, when one word came to mind.

Vampire!

No they couldn't be!

Could they?

No!

They don't exist!

Do they?

"Looks like someone's figured out what we are." Laurent announced, quiet laughing.

_NO! They can't be._ My mind screamed.

"So it would seem." James replied, as he walked around and stood in front of me. He took my face in his hands and titled my head towards him.

"Do you know what happens to a human that finds out what were are?" he asked me.

I shook my head no.

"They'd get killed or turned," he said.

Not understanding what he meant by turned, I stared at him blankly.

He chuckled and explained. "You would be turned into a vampire".

I froze, terrified. No he wouldn't. Would he?

My mother somehow got the gag off her mouth and started shouting for help.

"Laurent, shut her up." Victoria demaned him, still having a hold of Phil who was still moaning in pain. Laurent moved to fast for me to see and covered my mom's mouth.

"No, leave her alone. Get away from her." I yelled, as I tired to shake my face from James grasp. I started to panic. Praying they would leave her alone. I could see the fear in her eyes.

James put his hand on my mouth to stop my yelling and lean towards me.

"I like your spirit little one. I've always wanted a pet." James cooed at me.

I frowned at him. Pet? How did he think he is? James just laughed at me and patted my head.

"Now, Bella, you have two choices. One, you come with us, become what we are and we'll leave your parents alive. Or you can die tonight, _slowly_ along with your parents. Your choice.

"James, what the hell are you upto? Why would even think about changing her?" Victoria hissed angrily at him.

"Now, now Victoria. No reason to get angry," he purred to her, then turned his attention back to me, "Make your choice, Isabella."

My mind was made up the second he said he would let them live. I looked into my mother eyes, pleading with her to understand. I didn't want them to suffer. If I had to be with James and the others, then I would as long as my mother and Phil go free.

"I'll come with you. Please just leave them alone" I whispered.

"Good girl." James said as he walked towards my mother and Laurent, who still had a hold of her. "Wonder if you taste as good as you smell." he said to her.

Victoria snapped Phil's neck and walked toward my mother.

"You said you would let them live." I screamed at him. I struggled trying to free myself, even though there was nothing I could do to stop him. The wire wrapped around my arm loosened.

"And remember what I said happens to people who know what we are?" he smirked, making me stop my movements.

His words from earlier played in my head. _They'd get killed or turned. _Killed! He wasn't planning on letting them go. Just making me promise to go with them.

I watched helplessly as they descended on my mother and drank from her. Her screams were deafing.

Then everything went silent.

I'll never forget the look of her eyes again. I made a promise to myself that I will never let these monster see how much pain they have cause me.

The wire fell from my arms and since my feet weren't tied, I got up as fast as I could and ran toward the door. I almost made it before I trip over my own feet and came crashing down hard. I hit my head on a floor hard. Blood started seeping from the wound in my head. I started getting dizzy, black spots in my vision. I pretty sure that my wrist it broken, from trying to catch my fall.

I heard laughter behind me. "Well, that was the was the worst escape attempt I have ever seen." Laurent laughed.

I turned over, so I was lying on my back. I clutched my arm to my chest as it started to throb, yet I did not scream.

I watched, James slowly walked towards me like a predator ready to catch it prey. He leaned down and straddled my waist, grabbing my collar of my coat and pulling me up.

He had a twinckle of excitment in his eyes as he lowered his mouth to my ear, "You'll never get away for us. You'll will stay with us forever. If you run, I will always find you. You belong to me." he whispered. I felt his teeth on my neck before he pierce my skin. Breaking the promise I made to myself I screamed loudly and tried to move away, but it was hopeless. As soon as he removed his teeth, the pain started.

Thankfully everything went dark.

...

_Review. Review.:D_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summery:** Bella's mother and step-father are killed. She is turned into the very thing that killed them. Weeks of torture, Bella escapes and runs to her fathers. Teaming up with wolves to kill all vampire that cross their land, only to find out that she is the mate of a certain bronzen haired vampire. Can Bella learn to love something she hates the most? Can she learn to love herself?

**Pairing: **Bella/Edward

**Warning:** None for this chapter

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Twilight or any of the characters. All belongs to Stephenie Meyers.

(Some of the lines are from the breaking dawn book.. I have no intent of make any money from it, so please don't sue me.)

...

**Chapter 2 - Waking up**

**BPOV**

Darkness.

Fire.

Heat.

Pain.

I felt like I was in the firey pits of hell. What was happening to me? Where am I? Please someone make it stop.

...

Think. Remember.

I remember getting ready to go to dinner. I remember getting to the restuarant. I remember telling my mother that I wanted to stay with my father. I remember her trying to talk me out of it. I remember getting ready to go home, but after that all I remember is waking up feeling like someone had throwing in to a raging fire. I've live the Pheonix most of my life, you would think that I would be use to heat. But nothing could prepare me from what's happening now.

I writhered in the grip of the fiery torture. I slipped in and out of darkness. I pray that the darkness would win. I couldn't understand what was happening to me. What has cause this to happen? I wanted to scream, yell for someone to put it out or kill me, but something told me that it wouldn't help.

The fire blazed hotter as time went on. I struggled to keep from moving as my body wanted to thrashed around. I heard something thumping, I tried to work out what it was, hoping it would take my mind of the pain. After a few minutes, I could tell it was my heart. The thumping was in rythme of how fast my heart felt. But how could my heart beat so loudly?

I was still coherent enough that I could hear tiny whispers in the distance.

"She should be screaming." I heard a voice say from the side.

"Yes, she should. I'm glad I kept her now, she's going to be a great one to break." another voice said.

I didn't recognize their voices. But they sounded like males. I starting panicking as I picked out words. Screaming? Kept? Break? Why did they keep me? Why did they want to break me? Was it them? Have they done this to me? Will they make it stop?

Darkness finally won.

...

Hours had passed, days even, and I only fell deeper into the fire as the flames went higher, burning every essence of my being. I could feel every stabbing pain of the flames licking at my flesh. Surely by now I was charred black, burnt beyond recognition. Unless time was passing at an unholy pace. Then all of a sudden, my heart started to race. It felt like it was getting ready to rip through my ribs. The burning got even hotter as it spreaded towards my heart. The heat and pain that I had been drowning in started evaporating slowly, as my heart gave two final thumps before it stop. As I strained to stop from crying out at the last burst of pain I knew I should be dying.

All at once everything stopped. No burning. No noise. No breathing. No beathing heart. Not even mine.

I felt wonderful. Moving slightly, I smiled at the pleasant humming sensation that coursed through me. I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling, the colours of the wood ceiling, swirling at me. Everything was bright and focused. What was going on? I could see all the different shades of grey. Even colors I didn't know the name too.

I lay there not moving, for how long I don't know, happy the burning pain had vanished. Then something moved beside me. My head snap to the side, there I saw three people standing - two men and a woman - they stood completely still, focusing on me.

One of the men moved an inch, and without relising my actions, my body shot up and across the other side and found myself on my feet, crouched as if I were about to pounce.

A snarl ripped throught my chest. _Did I just do that? How did I move so fast?_

As I took a breath, it felt different. Like I didn't need to do it. Again what the hell is going on?

My eyes scanned the room. There was a small bed behide me. Which I assumed was were I lay. There was not a whole lot more in the place other than a sink, fireplace and a table and chairs. From what it looked like inside it remained me of a log cabin. It also looked like no-one had lived in awhile. There was a smell of death in the air.

I turned my attention back to the strangers in the room. I panicked when I looked in their eyes. Their eyes were...RED.

Red? When does that seem familiar? Something is very wrong.

"Who are you?" I asked. My hand went to my mouth, I was startled by my own voice. It didn't sound like me. My voice rang and skimmered like a bell.

"You don't remember me?" one of the men asked, slowly walked towards me, his hands held up.

"No," I said, shaking my head, not relaxing my tense body, I stood up abit straighter, "Who are you? Why am I here? What do you want from me?" I asked. I couldn't remember how or why I was here. I just wanted to go home. Who was this man?

He closed the gap between us and stood in front of me. He narrowed his eyes at me, like he didn't believe me. _Why would I lie?_

"Who are you?" I asked again, still shocked with the sound of my voice.

"My name is James." he said, still looking at me with narrowed eyes.

"James." I muttered. It felt like posion on my tongue.

I flinched when James tried to touch me. Ignoring my flinch he grabbed my chin, tilting my head look at him,"Do you remember me, now?"

Again I shook my head no. There was something familiar about him but I couldn't place it. Something in the back of my head told me I didn't want to remember this man and how I knew him. Something felt wrong as he continued to hold my chin. His eyes flashes dark and he had a smirk on his face. I took a deep breath as smelled the scent of earth and cimmon. Is that him? How the hell could I smell him.

"This is Laurent and Victoria," he gestured behide him as I looked at the other occupants in the room, "Do you remember them?"

I turned my gaze back to James, shaking my head. I couldn't remember them. Didn't know why they were here? Why I'm here? What do they want with me? My head started to hurt with all these thoughts in my head. Again I asked him who, what and why, but no-one would answer me. I just want to go home. But...but where was home? I can't remember. Why couldn't I rememeber?

My throat was burning slightly. My hand stroked it slowly, hoping it would it help. It wasn't. Remembering I saw a sink in the room, I made my over. My eyes unfocused for a moment, as moved with the speed I didn't know I had, I stood in front of the sink. _How the hell did I get here so fast? I didn't even trip once._ Shaking my head as nothing at all seemed to making scense, I turn on the tap, I lean my head over to take a drink.

As the water ran down my thoat I gagged. I felt like I was drinking acid. I dropped to my knees and heave. Trying to get the water out.

I heard laughing behind me.

"Silly, little girl," James smirked at me, kneeling down beside me, patting my head, "That won't help the burn you're feeling now."

"What's happening to me?" I asked, whimpering as the burning feeling intensified, "What have you done to me?"

"I've turned you."

"Turned me?"

"A vampire."

I laughed loudly. I couldn't help it. What's wrong with him? Vampires don't exist. I'm not one. I'm Bella. Human Bella. No way was I a vampire. I didn't believe in them. Vampires were just mystical creature I read about in stories. They're not real.

"You're insane."

James face was serious as he kept smirking at me, "Am I really?"

My eyebrows frown, looking at his face I could tell that he was telling the truth or was that because, he really is insane and he believes that he is a vampire and turned me into one. In attempted to humor him, I placed my hand to my chest, where my heart should beat. Nothing! _What the HELL?_ Moving by hand up, I put my fingers to were my pulse should beat. Again nothing. No. No, this can't be happening. This isn't real. They must have drugged me or something. I have to be hull... or something. Right?

I whimpered more as burning got worse. Oh God. They've turned me into a monster.

"You need to feed. It's the only way to stop the pain you're feeling."

Feed?

Vampires + Feeding = Blood.

"No. No, No." I cried out, pushing myself away from James.

"Yes. Yes, yes," James mocked, "It's the only way. You have no choice."

He moved over to Victoria and whispered something in her ear that I couldn't make it out. She turned to look at me, an evil smile graced her face before she turned and shot out of the door. Leaving me stunned. I could here her running away from the cabin, till everything went silent. More questions entered my head. _How did she move so fast? Do all vampire do that? Can I? What did he say to her? Why did she look at me like that? How the hell could I hear her footsteps from inside, when I couldn't hear what James said to her? Where did she go? _

James and Laurent hovered around me staring between me and the door. Could I make it out of here, before they caught me? I doubt it. Not with the way Victoria had left. The speed was to fast, I didn't know if I could be. Why were they looking excited for?

I didn't have to ask anything as I heared some run towards to cabin. As I looked back at the door Victoria step through, holding a girl that I thought was no more than my age. Why did Victoria bring her here. Like a light bulb went off in my head, my eyes widened as a realised that the girl was for me.

The burning in my throat, flickered to life as I took a breath. I pulled myself up and away from them, standing on the other side of the room, plastering my back on the wall. The wall started to crack as I pushed back futher into the wall.

James came over to me and pulled me close to him, trapping my arms behind my back, moving me towards Victoria and the girl, "Time to feed the newborn."

I tried to move away from him, this only caused him to growl and yank me back to him.

Victoria and the girl stood in front of us, I held my breath. The girl was crying and begging not to be hurt, that she would tell anyone about us, that she just wanted to go home. Victoria just laughed and pulled on the girls hair yanked her head to the side, while James moved my head down to the girls neck. My lips hovered over her pulse, I could feel it beating faster and faster. I started to panick as I was tempted to breath. I knew I didn't need to do it now -vampires don't need to- but the urge to do so was strong. But I had to be stronger than that. I will not be responiable for this girls deaths.

This went on for a few minutes before I felt James' fingers threaded through my hair, pulling harshly on it, causing me to yelp at the pain, which in turned made me breath deeply. The girls scent swirled around me and a deep growl came from me.

I was going to be sick.

The smell was horrible. Like someone had left grabbage laying in their backgard for weeks.

I used what little strenght I had and threw James off of me. I jumped back away from them untill I was back in the same place before James grabbed me. Shaking my head, I dropped down to the ground and hugged my knees to my chest.

"Impossible," Laurant say, awe in his voice, "Never have I seen a newborn refused fresh blood."

"Neither have I," James growled low as he stood back up, storming towards me. He yanked me up by the back of my neck, tilting my head up to him, "How did you do that?"

"I...I...I don't know. I just...just couldn't...the smell was horrible." I stuttered.

"Tried again." he commanded me.

"No." I yelled, pulling myself away from him, "I will not killed her. I will not. You can't make me. I don't care what you do to me. I will not kill."

"You will have to feed soon or you will die."

"Then I'll die." I vowed.

"We shall see." Victoria hissed at me. Having enough she sunk her teeth into the girls neck. The girls screams were to much. I closed eyes and covered my ear with my hands, hoping to drown it out. Something flashed in my head. I saw a woman tidy to a chair, screaming and three people feed from her. I notice Victoria's flaming red hair. The other must be James and Laurant. _But who was that woman? And why do I remember this? Was I there? I had to be, didn't I?_

I came back to the present when the screaming had stopped. The girls lifeless body lay on a heap on to floor. James pulled Victoria to him and kiss her, licking the blood from her face. Laurant stood back shaking his head at them, with a silly grin on his face. Guess he was use to seeing them like this. I was disgusted. How could they act like this? That poor girl was murder by their hands and they started to make out, like it was a big turn on.

I had to get out of here.

Without think of the consequences, I bolted for the door. Hoping to get as far away from these things as I could.

I ran as fast as I could through the trees that were all around me. I guess I was in some sort of forest. The speed I was going at was crazy, I couldn't get my head around it. If I was human I wouldn't have made it through the door. Now being this...this thing, I was running so fast I was dodging every tree and rock that was in my way.

I could heared feet pounding the ground behide me, from the sounds of them, they were near. I tried to turn left, lead them around in circles and away from me, but I felt something hit me from behide, sending me sprawling across the forest.

Tree's crushed from the impact of my body untill I came to a stop, face first. I tried to get up but what felt like a foot pushed me back down, to where my face was planted in the dirt. From the scent above me, I knew it was James.

"You really thought you could get away from me?" His voice was frightingly calm.

I struggled to get up but James was having none of that. He turned me over so I was flat on my back. He straddled my waist, holding my arms above my head. His dark eyes glowed in the moonlight, "You can never get away from me. My gift will always fine you. You belong to me."

"Gift?" I asked confused, forgetting the part were he said I belong to him.

"Yes, gift." he smirked, "Do you know what kind of gift I have?"

I shook my head no, still confused. If vampires aren't mith. Then them having gift, throw me through a loop.

"Traking," he annouched, "I can track anyone, anywhere. All I have to do is have their scent. And I will always find them."

He leaned down to my neck and breathed deeply, taking in my scent. I started to shake. I will never be free, will I?

"No matter where you go, no matter how far you run I will always find you." he mummble against my throat, "Mmm, you smell like lavender and freesia."

James started to laugh as a low possessive growl was heared. I looked behide him and saw Victoria barring her teeth, her eyes were pitch black, glaring at me. _What did I do to cause so much hated in her eyes?_ James was still laughing as he pick me off the forest floor and heaved me on to his shoulder before running back the way we came.

I was throwing back into the cabin after a few seconds. Leading near the dead girl. I crawled away from her quickly only to stop short and Laurent stepped behide me.

"Now. I think is time for some fun." James chuckled to me, "You have to punished for running away. What better way to do that is have my Victoria use one of her special grifts."

I froze in fear and Victoria stalked towards me, an evil glint in her eyes. She walk like a lioness, ready to catch her prey. Before I could blink she was on top of me, her teeth sun into my neck like a knife in butter. I screamed from the pain. I tried to claw at her but that only caused her to sink her teeth in deeper. She let go after a few mintues and I thought that was it.

How wrong I was.

...

_Thanks to all who have add the story to favorites and alerts. It means alot. But it would mean so much more if you could review aswell. I'll do a happy dance to all who do:D..._

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	3. Chapter 3

**Summery:** Bella's mother and step-father are killed. She is turned into the very thing that killed them. Weeks of torture, Bella escapes and runs to her fathers. Teaming up with wolves to kill all vampire that cross their land, only to find out that she is the mate of a certain bronzen haired vampire. Can Bella learn to love something she hates the most? Can she learn to love herself?

**Pairing: **Bella/Edward

**Warning:** None for this chapter

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Twilight or any of the characters. All belongs to Stephenie Meyers.

...

**Chapter Three - Torture, Learning and Remembering.**

**BPOV**

...

From what I learned Victoria 'gift' as James put it; wasn't a gift at all, but a from a torture a vampire can place on another.

Venom.

All vampires have it.

And Victoria like to use it.

I have no idea why she hates me so much, but every chance she got she'd find a new place to bite and make me scream in pain. What it because she likes to torture? Has she always been like this? Or is becasue James pays special attention to me?

Weeks past more or less in the same fashion, although Victoria's tauting and torture got more violent as I refused everytime they would bring me a human to feed on, but the burn in my throat was taking its toll on me.

"Scream for me," Victoria tauted at me.

I would usally fight back with Victoria but now I don't have the energy.

"No." I whimpered as her nails dug into me.

"This is getting boring. You scream sooner or later."

She let go and pick up her latest victim.

A boy no more than six years old. He was to afraid to speak and silent cried into his teddy he was carrying.

"No, leave him alone." I growled out, trying to get up.

Victoria laughed, grabbing the boys teddy and throwing it into the fire that was burning in the cabin.

The boy started to cry.

It was getting harder and harder to resist what they offer to fed me, even if the smell was horrible. But I stood my ground.

"You'll feed on him or I'll make his death slow and painful. All you can is watch."

The little boys cried louder and I snapped.

I launched myself at her.

The boy fell over as I grabbed Victoria.

I heard aloud bang, but paid no attention as my hands gribbed Victoria's hair, using what strenght I had left I threw her across the room.

I turned to the boy preparing to run and get him to safety, but stop short when the fimilar smell reach me. The little boys head was soaked with blood, he lay still. I couldn't hear a heart beat. I froze. Relising i killed him even if I didn't mean too.

"You may have not have feed from him but its you're fault he's dead." Victoria laughed.

I roar of anguish rage out of me, leaped across, flinging myself at her.

She landed on her back with me on top, she was still laughing.

I saw red and I suck my teeth into her neck.

Music sounded in my ear as Victoria howled in pain as my venom soared threw her.

I wanted to rip her apart and burn the piece.

I want her dead.

My nails cut into her as she tried to push me off.

Dead. Dead. I want her dead.

Never have I ever had these thoughts but the little boy dead behide me was the last straw.

In my angered state I didnt sense James come up behide me.

I roared furiously as he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me away from Victoria.

I struggled in his arms trying to get to her.

James growled low in my ear, "I knew you were gona be fun to have around.

"You'll pay for that, Bitch." Victoria hissed at me, not hearing what he said.

And pay I did.

Instead of biting, Victoria used her strenght to rip me apart.

Sheer hot pain shot through, my whole being.

I thought I would surely die, but to my shock, my arm or finger, which ever was rip off would somehow glue itself back on. I had no idea how it was done, but I pefered when I was getting bitten, the pain I could take.

I noticed I wasn't healing as quickly as I did in the beginning. The pain lasted for days instead of hours.

I was getting pass the point of caring. I kept myself quite and to myself when the others were around which was most of the time. I was never aloud to be myself and never alone with James, thanks to Victoria. I was happy about that, Even though its Victoria that tortures me day in and day out, I would take her over James anyday. Who knows what goes on in that head of his. The way he looks at me and smirks when I look at him, I don't wanna know.

...

"Why does Victoria hated me so much," I asked Laurent one day when James and Victoria left to hunt, "What did I do to her?"

Laurent laughed lightly before answering, "She's jealous."

_Jealous? _"Jealous of what?"

"You."

"Me? Why?"

"The way James acts around you. The way he touches you. Victoria, see's a desire in James that he has for you and really doesn't like it," he chuckles lightly, "Mates are very jealous with others."

"Mates?"

"Yes, mates."

Seeing my confused look he explained futher.

"Mates are the other half of another vampire," he said sitting down next to me as I tried not to flinch, "You can say soulmates like humans thinks. Although being vampire mate is much more deeper and powerful. Both are very possessive each other. Males are the more dominant of the two. Especially in the first year of mating. Anyone who comes between them usually doesn't live through it. Mates will die for each other. Vampires can walk this earth for hundred of years and never find there mates, but once they do, its something to tresure."

My head was reeling from this new information. I felt fear run through me at the though of begin a soul mate to one of these creature that I am now. How can something so violent and evil have a soulmate? Do we even have souls? Maybe some of us do. Is that why I can go without freeding on humans when they're bleeding all over me?

"If James is her mate, then why does he have a desire in me? I mean, if mates are loyal to each other, he shouldn't be desiring me. Should he?"

"Mmm...good question." Laurent looked thoughfully, before shrugging his shoulders, he looked back at me, "Maybe they're not true mates. Maybe they see a likeness in one another that bonds them differently. Who knows?"

"How do you know when you find your mate?" I asked, hoping that I would never find mines. And if I did, I knew what it looked like or felt like I could run or something before I was bonded to them for the rest of this life.

"From what I understand, you get a warm feel within when you first see them, a tingling sension I think. Then nothing else in the world matter, its just you and your mate. They also mark each other, by biting in the heat of the moment or when they're truely connected as one."

...

Laurent stepped outside, to take in the night sky, while he waited for the others to return, but was still close to the cabin where he could keep an eye on me.

I placed my hand in my pocket of my jacket. I felt something like a thin chain wrap around my fingers.

Pulling my hand out it was indeed a chain or neckless.

I brought it closer and it read: 'Special Daughter'.

I frowned, wondering why I had it.

All of a sudden I gasped as my head started to spin.

Thoughts of the past flashed through my head.

I remembered my mother and Step-father: we were going out to celeabrate my birthday. I remember hating the thought of it. I remember the letter from Charlie. I remember the neckless. I remember saying I was going to life with Charlie untill I graduated. I remember Renee getting upset. I remember us leaving the restuarant and meeting three stangers. I remember these strangers taking us to an abondon building. I remember screaming. I remember blood. I remember the look in my mothers eyes when these strangers killed her. I know who these strangers are.

A growl rose in my throat as the memories kept repeating themselves.

They made me think Renee and Phil were going to live only to lie and kill them.

These moster turned me into one of them for their own sicken pleasure.

That's it! No more being afraid! No more getting beaten!

A giggle of laughter brought me back to the present time.

Victoria and James were back.

I had to hold in the growl that wanted to get out. I wrapped arms around my legs so I wouldn't jump up and try to kill them for what they have done. They would rip me apart and watch while I glued myself together. Then they would start all over again. I would have to bid my time until I could get away from them.

I started planning my ecsape, but I had no idea how I was going to get away.

With James' gift, the chances were slim.

If I have to die before I am free, then so be it.

...

_**Sorry if this chapter is short, wanted to get it out there and speed the story up.**_

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